The one with the forgetting...

It was a typical evening in the Chaos household : all of the boys were downstairs playing, Spoiled Princess was at cheerleading & Southern Darlin' was at the kitchen table working on homework.   I had just sat down on my bed while I looked through a pile of papers  when Southern Darlin' pops her head in and says "Uhmm, Mom? Dad?  Are you guys going to go get Spoiled Princess? Did you forget about her?? I mean it's 5:58 !!"  

She was actually getting upset. LOL. I gently reminded her that SP was cheering at a game tonight and wouldn't be done until after 7pm which had SD breathing a sigh of relief.    Normal cheerleading practice is over at 5pm so if we had forgotten her - we had really  forgotten her. lol!

I'm not sure why in the world she thought we had forgotten SP, it's not like I forget the kids on a regular basis.  Sure there was this ONE time a few weeks ago and I wasn't even late to pick them up!

Once a month SD & SP have student council after school.  It just so happen that SP also has cheerleading practice (both at the school building) and so she splits her time between the two. Adding to the craziness, Dimples has group therapy after school 15mins away and Yep! you guessed it, they all get out at the exact same time!   On this particular day, Daddy Chaos was at home with a sore back and so I assured him that I would pick up Dimples a few minutes early and then swing by to get the girls.  Off I went, grabbed Dimples - who happened to be in a talkative mood- and chatted with him the entire way home.  It wasn't until I walked into the house that I realized (okay I admit it, Daddy Chaos realized it first) that I had driven home vs going from therapy to school to grab the girls.  So I hightailed it off to school and arrived toward the end of the line of parents picking up kids.  STILL I wasn't technically late.   But I made the mistake of mentioning to Southern Darlin' that I had forgotten to get them and had to rush over.  She apparently it going to let this one go. 

In my head - no one sat outside alone and wondering, I was there with the other parents and so it doesn't count. In her head - I admitted that I had forgotten them for a brief moment and therefore it can and will happen again.    sigh.

The One With the #MeanMom

I am pretty much almost always a Mean Mom.

* I make my kids do chores.  - What else do you have kids for if not to do the household chores that you hate?

* I make them read for at least 20 mins every night, more if they don't have homework.  - hey, reading is good for you!!

* I make them still ride in various forms of car seats/ boosters despite the fact that they are 7-11 yrs old. If the seatbelt doesn't fit right then you sit in a booster, and if you are still scrawny enough to fit in a 5pt harness then by golly you'll be there til you outgrow it. I don't care if you will be 15 by then! lol!

* I believe in grounding.  If you break the rules which you clearly know because they have been the same rules forever, then I am going to ground you from whatever you love most.  For the oldest (at home) , he gets grounded from being in his room except for actually sleeping b/c as a teenage boy he virtually lives in that room. The others get grounded from anything that requires batteries or being plugged in.  Hit 'em where it hurts!  That's my motto.


So I thought it might be kinda fun to have Mean Mom Mondays where I can talk about all the ways my kids have deemed me a mean mom.  I happen to have a prime example.

Laundry is a chore for the kids. They are responsible for bringing their own laundry to the laundry room in a timely manner.  There is nothing I hate more than hearing "I don't have any pants" when they are supposed to be getting dressed for school!!  It burns me!

I wash the clothes,  I dry the clothes... Heck I even lay out any shirts nicely so they don't get wrinkled from sitting in the dryer or basket. But they must bring their dirty clothes to the laundry room in order for them to get washed. I am not chasing them down.  In fact the only part of laundry that they actually do it gather it, fold it & put it away. Not too hard right?

Well I have been getting pretty sick and tired of these kids being slobs. They either a)don't put everything away and just throw it in their closet  *ahem. Fishing Pole * or b) they try something on, get told to change b/c it's not weather appropriate and toss said clean clothing item on the floor/bed/chair - so when they are gathering their dirty clothes they get all this clean crap -because by now, who knows what's clean and what's dirty?- and into the laundry it goes.

It infuriates me to be sitting there (yes, I sit on the floor to sort laundry... you try doing laundry for 7 people and see if you don't sit to go thru the mounds) sorting laundry only to come across pairs of matched (clean) socks or a clean shirt that is STILL FOLDED.  It kills me.  So I finally got sick of yelling b/c let's face it, it doesn't change.  I now charge per clean clothing item that I find. Said offender has to give 5 mins of foot rubbing per clean item I find.   This is a newly instituted rule in the house and Southern Darlin' just happened to be the first to pay it's price.

Hers was a shirt which she had on for 5 mins and was told to change.  Now she tried to blame Spoiled Princess b/c she gathered the laundry but I explained that if she had put the shirt away when she changed, it wouldn't have been laying on the floor/bed/chair and Spoiled Princess wouldn't have thought it was dirty.

Mom - 1 Southern Darlin - 0 

There was huffing and eye rolling.  We are in the midst of the tween years and she's trying out her attitude.  Of course attitude is something else I don't put up with so she got the joy of folding 3 baskets of laundry alone without her siblings help.   Yep, Mean Mom status reaffirmed!

Are you a mean mom too?

The One with the catch-all

Dear bloggy friends,

I have been neglecting you something awful.  Do I have excuses? Sure tons!! But like I tell my kids, excuses don't make things better. Just say you're sorry.  And so - I'm sorry.

I'm trying to figure out some sort of schedule so I will have a certain topic to post every day (or at least several days a week).  Not that I'm so conceited to think you guys actually read here often, but I started this blog as a way to remember all the ups and downs, the little things that pass by so quickly and then the kids are grown and away.  If anyone has any ideas - feel free to shout them out!

For now, a major catch up :

Let's just go down the list -

Drama Queen- is back in school and still living with her cousin.  Next semester she'll either be moving back home and commuting or more likely getting her own place. She enjoys her freedom but also seems to get a little homesick from time to time.She comes home probably twice a week on average. :) It's hard basically living alone when you come from a large family. Just the general chaos is soothing sometimes!  But all in all, she's good! Classes are going well and she's happy!

Attitude King - is a senior in high school this year. We are slowly bypassing the teenage boy stage where the only communication consists of grunts and eye rolls. He actually comes home from school and tells us what he did that day.  PROGRESS!  He's starting to get excited about college and we have 2 college visits planned this month!  Ahhh!!  Just when you finally start getting the kid back and he's ready to move away! lol! 

Southern Darlin -  is a 6th grader this year!  In our school system, our elementary goes until 6th grade, then you go to the middle school for 7-8 and the huge high school after that.  So this is the last year that she gets to stay in the same school with all her younger siblings. In fact, it's the LAST year that all four will be in the same school ever again! Ahhh ! So anyway, things are starting to get a little tougher for Southern Darlin.. She has switched from having math in a small group setting back to the regular classroom - which means homework every.single.night.  Ohh the horrors!  She is finally starting to learn the ins and outs of friendship and a bully (who she swore was a friend but was really a controlling brat) finally moved away leaving her with the ability to actually make more friends who are actually nice to her! Yay!  In her eyes, the most exciting thing so far about 6th grade is that they get to use iPads! lol!  They are supposed to eventually be able to bring them home, but honestly to me- that's just too much responsibility and I don't think she needs the extra screen time anyway. I mean this is the kid who loses her jacket on a weekly basis and breaks a water bottle (how?!) monthly.  Yeah, no.  So she's not thrilled that I told her the iPads were for school use only. lol.  Oops, mean mom strikes again!   She's a tad bit worried about 7th grade already. I keep telling her it's an entire year away!! Worry later!  But big worries - #1. She will have to ride the bus (I currently drive the group to school but middle school starts way earlier and it's just not going to happen) #2. No recess!!   So far those are the main worries. lol.

Spoiled Princess - is now in 5th grade! I still remember her first day of kindergarten; I don't know how they grow up so darn fast! She is my straight A student with tons of friends and no school worries. I worry a little that she's going to become too popular and become the mean girl but I've been firmly nipping any signs of that in the bud! lol!  She got the brand new teacher at school this year but is totally in love with her :)  Lots of new friends.  Life is good for her :)   All of the kids have been in swim lessons all summer but Spoiled Princess floats about like a cement brick! lol This kid struggles so hard to get this figured out. lol.  DH says it's because she doesn't have much fat, just all muscle and us fatties just float easier. lol But of the 4 she certainly tries the hardest!!

Fishing Pole - is now in 4th grade. He's creeping up there! He's struggling bit with paying attention and behaving but overall is having a good year. His grades are decent, of course he gets a C on his midterm and is immediately worried that they will hold him back!  lol.  Southern Darlin' had an F and could care less. lol.  I explained to him that he needed to always do his best but a C would not have them hold him back and again it's way too early to even be worrying about stuff like that! lol!  Other than that, the boy has been a medical stress point for me.  We saw genetics for both little boys over the summer. Genetics feels that they both possibly have ARND (alcohol related neurodevelopmental deficient) but also with all of Fishing Pole's many different medical issues they want to do chromosomal testing.  So now we wait months and months to get insurance approval to get the testing done.  If anything comes back ++ on him, then we'll check Dimples too.  Next came a routine EKG to check things after we finally convinced the psych dr to put him on a stimulant to help his ADHD instead of the crap stuff he had him on that did nothing.  Of course the EKG came back wonky and we had to stop the meds :(  wait a while do another EKG - which came back fine - and restart meds.  So now we wait for enough time to pass and do yet another EKG.  Fun times I tell ya!   Oh but that's not all, then the boy has been having severe leg pains and weakness. Dr appt = bloodwork = neg. for any arthritis type factors so now we sit and wait for a PT eval..  I'm honestly wondering if it's just not another sign of his Dystautonomia coming through?    Life is always busy and crazy with this kid!

Dimples - is now in 2nd grade! He's finally gained a little weight and grown so he doesn't look like quite the munchkin in the class. lol.  This year his IEP is finally in place. He doesn't have a 1on1 para but another student in the classroom does and they share.  This year has been hard for him. He's having a lot of anxiety and is more restlessness/distractability.  It's that fine line - the para who has known him for a few years is thrilled that they finally can see some of his personality coming thru which we definitely don't want to squash by raising meds too high, but he's also a distraction in class and having a hard time focusing. Some days it's great and he gets all his work done with no extra help, other days he gets nothing done.  This year he has also become more socially aware - in that he says no one is his friend and/or plays with him.  Yet he also hasn't really figured out how to play with others well.  It's heartbreaking to hear several times a day that he has no friends but I'm at a loss on how to help right now.  We've tried steering him towards the girls (who love him) because girls are more nurturing and forgiving than boys.  Let's be honest, boys at this age can be little brats. lol.  Medical wise, he is doing well.  We have a sleep study coming up b/c the boy is having issues sleeping. His sleep meds used to help but don't seem to be working quite as well any longer.   He also has some weird puking spells (middle of the night) and is fine the next day, along with random low grade temperatures that are driving me insane.  I need to start making a chart so I can see if I can find a pattern. Lol.  


Daddy Chaos & I  are doing well. We've been working on remodeling the dining room.  New paint *gasp* which has brightened the house significantly! My entire house was basically one color when we bought it and I finally got sick of it. lol.  New flooring is in the dining room, we plan on putting it into the living room as well once DH recovers from the dining room installation! lol!   I'm still doing final touches - I need to find new drapes and an area rug but then I'll post a picture! :)   I would LOVE to redo the kitchen but that project is just above and beyond my ambitions for quite some time. lol!  I know our limits :)    


In other news, my niece moved in with us in June right after my great nephew was born. O.M.G. we are all so in love with the newest member to the family!  Baby fest in the house every day!  Sadly, she just moved out a week ago so we went from playing with the baby daily to not seeing him but maybe once a week. It's an adjustment for us all! lol   He'll be 4months old this week, just another example of how quickly time flies by!  Baby D is the cutest, squishiest little boy you've ever met!  I'm not the slightest bit biased :) LOL

If you don't read the review blog and need some  (or know someone that needs some) proofreading, head over here and check me out!  I'm branching out and hoping to add a few more clients to my list! *Note- don't ever look at my writing and judge from there! lol. I'm actually a pretty good proofreader (shameless plug) but I never proofread my blog writing because otherwise I'd never publish anything! LOL! :)

Take care all!  

It's been 7 hours and 15 days....

Quick, did anyone get the song reference?  I hope so because now I can't get it out of my flippin head!  Argh!  Sinead, please no more singing in my head!  Apparently, I'm showing my age today! lol!  Okay, it's really been quite longer since I've posted but it was catchy.   We'll just say it's been a while.  We've passed thru Christmas, New Years, and two birthdays.  Drama Queen turned 19 and moved back home (she's switching to a college closer to home and commuting this semester).  Southern Darlin' turned 11 and this was the big birthday. This was the year that she has officially been with us for more birthdays than not.   Some days it still seems crazy to me that she hasn't spent her entire life here.  She has wormed her way right into the family and it's not until questions about when she was a baby arise that I have to remind myself that we didn't meet her until she was 5.

Once again, I got to play mean mom.  I scheduled both girls for oral surgery over Christmas break.  What?? They were off school, why not?   Drama Queen got all four wisdom teeth out (the day before her bday... ooops) and she is super lucky and ended up with a nice case of dry socket as well.  Bonus!!  I was given access to her cell phone and given instructions to video tape her when she came out all goofy.  Sadly, she woke up and was fine.  I was just a tiny bit disappointed.  Southern Darlin', on the other hand, was enough laughter to make up for it.  She had 4 baby teeth pulled plus 3 exposures (where they cut into the gums, hook little brackets & chains onto the teeth that have decided to go completely sideways instead of down and hook the chains onto her braces).  Apparently she was not cooperative with the sedation.  She sat there just fine but would not go to sleep. Of course once they got her knocked out, she didn't want to wake up.  lol.  The dr came out and said he gave her enough meds to knock me & Daddy Chaos out.  Eeek!  That girl was all over the place.  Crying because she was scared (which was super sad), then wanting to sit up and just flopping all over.  She had double vision which she thought was quite hilarious and kept giving commentary. Blackmail, my friends, I have blackmail..

Thankfully both girls are healed up from oral surgery and we can finally *hopefully* move forward with Southern Darlin's braces.
 
We are all trying to adjust to being back in school.  We were supposed to start back last week from Christmas break and went for 1.5days but had delays & snow days (which technically were because it was cold as can be and no one goes to school in such --- temps).. Another closure yesterday but we finally went back today.  All these delays and closures are playing havoc on Dimples and his need to know what's going to happen next.   He did fine for Christmas break because we were able to count down how many days of no school.  Sudden changes in the schedule make for an unhappy kiddo.  Well that and the fact that he doesn't particularly care for school.  lol.  I keep hoping that one of these days he'll decide it's not half bad, but I am not holding my breath.. If you hate school in 1st grade, I don't see how it's going to get any better.. lol.

The Birthday Tree- seems appropriate for a Season of Birthdays...

December began the Season of Birthdays.  2 in Dec, 2 in Jan, 2 in March (4 if we count my BIL & niece)..  Life is busy and hectic this time of year.  And costly.  Life is definitely costly during the Season of Birthdays.  Along with birthdays come annual well checks.  Dimples & Southern Darlin' go to the dr every three months to get a med check (height, weight, blood pressure) so it's nice to see a little growth there.  What surprised me this year was that Southern Darlin' has finally left Spoiled Princess in the dust!  For years and years, Spoiled Princess was the bigger of the two despite being a year younger.  This year Southern Darlin' has finally taken the lead at 4'10.5" & 80lbs!  Woot ! Woot!  Spoiled Princess is 4'9" & 74lbs.  No wonder all the sweat pants/ yoga pants (Soft pants as Dimples calls them ) won't fit around her waist and just fall off.  Even more amazing is that Dimples grew 1 inch & gained 1 lb in the past 3 months!!  If you recall, this is the kid that has been tiny forever. He's not a whopping 39lbs & 3'9" tall.  Yeah, he's still a bit of a munchkin for a 6yo but hey, he's finally grown into 5T pants & size 4/5 shirts (not 4T!!!).  It's the little things, people.

I could write on and on about the IEP madness that is about to make me pull my hair out, or the thoughts of another surrogacy and random email I received, or Fishing Pole and his increasing anxiety issues which directly turn into behavioral issues..  But I think this is enough playing catch up for now.

Until another day...

Playing Catch up- Take 2

So last time , we talked about how Fishing Pole kept me busy with his surgeries.. And is still keeping me busy while he's still on restrictions..

I'm going to try to summarize because we can all tell by now that I am no good at sticking to a plan or this post would have been up last week!

The week following Fishing Pole's surgery was a busy busy week.   On Monday, Dimples had an appt with a Psych to confirm all of our thoughts/fear (pediatrician, us parents, & his teacher).  Dimples was diagnosed with Autism.  Techinically, Asperger's syndrome but as "they" are soon to be doing away with that term and just incorporating it all under the Autism Spectrum Disorder umbrella, we'll just say high functioning Autism.   In the future, I may refer to it either way.   :sigh:.  This is a diagnosis that we've felt was coming for years now.  He has so many classic autistic symptoms, I'm surprised it took this long to get it.   FYI- if you want to incorporate an autism dx into your IEP (currently has a speech IEP), the school (at least ours) states that they do not recognize a doctor's diagnosis of Autism..  WTF?  I can feel a new fight coming on..

On Wednesday, Southern Darlin' had an MRI scheduled for her Brain.. Just to recheck the cysts we'd found there the previous year.   With some great Momma conning, I was able to get them to fit Dimples in for his MRI at the same time (to check for tethered spinal cord).  I do love our Children's hospital in that they always try to accommodate if they can.

Since both kids were being sedated, Daddy Chaos took off work and came along. We split up , I went with Dimples, Daddy went with Southern Darlin'.   In reality, Dimples went back a few minutes prior to Southern Darlin' so I was able to be with each of them as they drifted off to sleep.  Our hospital uses general anesthesia for MRIs vs iv sedation.   Probably a good thing since Southern Darlin' was getting a brain & full spine MRI which lasted 4.5hours.  ugh.

S.D. still doped up from the MRI :)

Dimples making a silly face.. Showing off Ducky Monkey's gown that the nurses made..

Both kiddos did great and then we were off to Southern Darlin's neurosurgery appt.  I LOVE our neurosurgeon.  She did both of Fishing Pole's back surgeries and is very personable.

Good news- Southern Darlin originally had 2 small cysts in her brain.. The smallest one has disappeared completely! Woohoo!  The other one, the one we worried more about, has shrunk just a teeny tiny bit.  Woohoo!!  The Dr was thrilled to pieces!!!  We are free from MRI's for a few years now, she does want to recheck again during puberty to make sure nothing starts growing.   Awesome appointment!!

Since we were there, the Dr asked how Fishing Pole was doing (remember this is 1 week post surgery) and I mentioned that Dimples just had his MRI done to check for tethered cord as well.. She immediately said, let me just go check on that for you..  She came back a few minutes later and we just turned our appointment into one for Dimples as well.   Yes, he most definitely had tethered cord as well.  ugh.   We knew this was probably coming but it's still not fun.   Our Dr is amazing (have I mentioned that yet) and we went right into discussing surgery options ect.  She decided since Fishing Pole had retethered and she had to go higher up for the second surgery, she would like to just go at the higher spot to start with for Dimples and hope that he wouldn't retether..   We walked out to schedule surgery..

Imagine our surprise when she had room the FOLLOWING week!!  Egads!!  We opted to go ahead and get it done. Hoping that the sooner it was done, the less likely chance he'd have of long term issues like FIshing Pole..

Surgery went well for Dimples.  He is most definitely NOT his brother when it comes to surgery/pain.  While Fishing Pole had to be repeatedly told to calm down, walk carefully, ect.. Dimples had us carry him everywhere for about a week.  He was only in the hospital 2 days, thank goodness .. Immediately upon waking up from surgery , he wanted to GO HOME..He does not do well with strange people & places.. :(   Hello Autism, thank you so much... 


It's been several weeks since the boys both had surgeries.  While they are still on restrictions, they are doing better every day.   We have noticed a decline in Dimples at school. His teacher described him as "delayed" thinking he was on pain meds that were fogging his mind but alas, he's been off all meds for a while.. :sigh:


On a completely happier note..  We celebrated birthdays of 2 of the 3 boys!   Fishing Pole turned 8!! and  Attitude King turned 16!!!   It's hard to imagine that they have both grown so much!  Makes a Momma a bit sad seeing all her kiddos growing up :(

Stop growing already !!

I am excellent at boredom.

Sitting in the hospital is sooo much fun.  Why yes, that was sarcasm.

Sigh.  Last week we finally got into to see neurology (been waiting since January).  They did a regular EEG and our dr took a quick peek and saw spikes in the rear of the brain (visual area) which could explain the vision loss spells Southen darlin' has been having for the past year. She was all set to start seizure meds ehen another dr read the eeg. They saw the spikes too but weren't sure of the frequency and so now we are doing an overnight video EEG.   We are 5hours into Southern Darlin's 20 hour EEG and I am bored to pieces..

I am not meant for sitting around stuck in a room.  Now I can laze around with the best of them if I want to but when I have to?  Bored to pieces!!   I would really suck at bedrest.  Ha.   Speaking of bedrest, I finally have a surrogacy blog up and running .  Click here to check it out!

Well back to being bored with this little girl for a while more.

A break to celebrate

It seems like all I've been doing lately is talking about Dimples.

It's true, a lot of my concern lately has been centered around him- for good reason, but I do have 5 other kiddos..

So I figured I'd break into the Dimples- OMG series to share a little bit of good news about Southern Darlin.

You might recall that I fought for a while to get her tested & designated "special education" but I kept at it.   And they gave in and tested her.

The school psychologist did the normal testing, her teacher did a report, I did a report, her reading recovery teacher did a report and the speech teacher tested her due to some quirks in her language.

We had our official meeting a week or so ago.  

It seems an odd thing to celebrate but they have qualified her "special ed".  I felt like jumping up and cheering!  Yipping & doing a little happy dance! 

In the report, they were able to accurately capture my child.  The psychologist was able to show that although she did appear to do well on some tests it was only because it's very difficult to show the delay in 1st grade.  She felt that she tested much better than she actually is.   For example, she had a good score in math because she could write numbers and count.  However, she cannot add or subtract unless she can use her fingers and then has to touch her face with said fingers to do it.  Anything over 10 is too difficult.  In addition if she adds 3+2 , at this stage most kids would say 3 and then continue to count their fingers- 4, 5.  She instead holds up 3 fingers on one hand & 2 on the other and then proceeds to count all 5 fingers.

It was very interesting to listen to the teachers realize that their testing showed different things and at times contradicted each other which once again proved that some days she knows things and others she doesn't.   The one thing everyone could agree on was that she tries her absolutely hardest and is always happy to put in a good effort.

Regardless, she is in!  She gets to continue onto 2nd grade and will have additional help.  She now gets a parapro in the classroom for 20-30mins a day, plus goes to speech for some language quirks (ironically qualified under language delay & other health impairment) & still gets to keep Reading Recovery til the end of the year.  

The special education teacher said that she normally only writes in one-two goals in an IEP. 

Southern Darlin' likes to excel at things. She has 4 goals for math and 2 for language.  Overachiever.. ha

I'm happy.

I know we've won..

And yet I'm worried.

I'm worried that 20-30 mins with one on one time with her parapro won't be enough.  Her teacher already spends at least that much one on one time with her throughout the day.  Plus she has another student's parapro that works with her when his student is doing ok.    The school feels putting her in an actual special needs classroom would be too restrictive and I feel that 20-30mins of one on one time is not going to be enough.  But we shall see.

Time will tell.   Until then, my fingers are crossed.

                    xoxo,

It's Valentine's Day!

So, it's Valentine's day today.. The little kids are having their parties. We spent some time (I won't say how long.. ugh) doing Valentine cards last night.  But we got them done! Yay, accomplishment! 

When going thru Southern Darlin's backpack, I found a note from the teacher reminding me that I had signed up to bring a "Surprise" for the V-party today.   Why I sign up for these things at the beginning of the year I don't know.  I guess I have all this anticipation that "Yay! School is starting! I'm going to have soo much time!!"  but then reality sets in. 

Regardless, I now get to provide a "surprise" (why is it a "s" instead of a "z" in surprise.  It just looks funny like that) for 22 kiddos.   You may recall that my amount of creativity is pretty low.  I was thinking of just buying some heart shaped zebra cakes and calling it a day. 

But then Drama Queen offered to make sugar cookies.  She's a better mother than me somedays.  Homemade treats? geesh!  Doesn't she realize this only gets the expectations up for future treats that I'll sign up for and then promptly forget about ?? 


Regardless, I did my grocery shopping and came home with some cute pink decorative sugar to top the sugar cookies that she planned on making.  It was then that she realized I didn't buy anything and actually expected her to come forth with her offer.  Ha! Taught her, didn't I?  Let's just see if she offers up her non-existent skills again!

So she huffed off to the kitchen to make the cookies that I refused to take over for her.  She popped her head back in several times to ask questions.  I told her to make the simplest kind- drop cookies vs cut out cookies.  It was then questioned on what to use for "dropping" the cookies to which her father responded - a tablespoon. 


It's times like these that remind us how literal our oldest can be.  As we peeked in the kitchen after hearing banging, we see her using a measuring teaspoon and trying to beat the little blob of cookie dough out of it.   She did not appreciate the laughter that ensued.  I assured her that she just need to drop them on & they would "melt" into circular shapes.

I admit now that it was probably a lack of communication and clear cut instructions with pictures that resulted but I'll just say the result was interesting...

They taste fine even if they do look a little... funny..  I think the pink adds something to it, don't you?   

So I sent Southern Darlin' off with a container of misfit cookies and made sure to remind her several times over and over how much her big sister loved her to make these cookies- thus insuring she tells everyone at school that Momma didn't make those pretty cookies, Drama Queen did...  *bows*
 
                 xoxo,

Happy 7th & 2nd !

Birthdays are a funny thing in the adoption world.  

At least to me they are.

With my biological kids, birthdays mean me reliving in my head the pregnancy & birth.  All the little details that get lost in the day to day.  How we waited and waited, then finally went to the hospital only to find out we were just 3cm dilated.   I can easily tell you exactly what time each of my birth children were born, what the day was like ect.. It's firmly etched into my brain.

Yet 2/3 of my children I did not give birth to.

I don't have any of that information on them. 

With the exception of TheToddler, I didn't even know of their existence until well after their birth. 

So it just seems odd to me to have a birthday and not be able to know all those little details or realize that 7yrs ago my daughter was born , yet I wouldn't come to know her for another 5 ½yrs.   It's just strange.

Maybe it's just me.  I've been known to be weird at times =)

Anyways, as I'm sure you've guessed- this is yet another birthday post..   Somehow the fates were laughing at me when I was blessed with my children.  2 late Dec birthdays, 1 mid January, 2 March birthdays within the week of each other & finally one May bday.  It's like a birthday-palooza ! Thankfully I get February off to rest for a moment but it is a short month after all.

Southern Darlin' celebrated her 7th birthday earlier this week!  Yay!!  This year, she is finally mine..  I know we've talked about it before- how sometimes you gotta fake it til you make it real.. Last year at this time of year, we were still firmly in the faking it.  She'd only been here 6months and we were in the throes of rages galore.

Now we are safe and secure. Life is calm on that front.  She has firmly entrenched herself into the family.

As I tucked her in the night before her bday- we giggled and played for a minute. It was fun and sweet and then all of the sudden quickly heartbreaking.

Momma: Ya know, when you wake up in the morning you're going to be seven!! Can you believe it?!  You are getting so old!

Southern Darlin': But I've only been here for 2birthdays now!

M: That's right! hmmm.... Maybe you're just going to be two not seven.  Since you've only been here for two birthdays..  I'm going to have to rethink all your presents now!

SD: Nooooooo!! :giggles:  Mommy!! :giggles:  I'm still going to be SEVEN! 

M: I'm not so sure.. You were right, you've only been here for 2 birthdays now. I think that makes you just 2..

:giggles all around:

M: Are you excited about your birthday tomorrow? You don't turn 2 every day!

SD: Mommmmmyyy..  sevvven  not twooooo.    I can't wait for my birthday! I think I'm really going to like it this year!

M: laughs..  What? You didn't like your birthday last year?

SD:  No. I was still really scared at my birthday.. but I'm not scared anymore so I think I'll really like this year.

 Talk about ripping my heart out and stomping on it.  I'm so glad that she's not scared anymore but it's heartwrenching that she once was.

Southern Darlin' is a lot of things.  She's adorable and cute.  She's funny and sweet.  She is loving and caring.  She tries her hardest everyday!

But most of all, I leave you with a picture that shows you her to a tee..

Most of all , Southern Darlin' is Happy..  And that's what's most important.

Happy birthday sweetheart!  2 or 7,  I'm so glad you are a part of our family now!

XOXO,

Your Momma

Crazy Days are back

I haven't talked about Southern Darlin' in a while on here.. The boys keep me busy and so they have been what I babble out. I worry, I babble.

Southern Darlin' had some problems in kindergarten. We went back and forth over whether to hold her back or let her go on to 1st grade. Finally in Feb. we got her on medication for her ADHD & anxiety which gave us a changed kid!  No more of the screaming and refusing to get out of the car. Her reading finally improved and she got moved out of the bottom group.  After some discussion with her kindy teacher, we all agreed that she was ready to move onto 1st grade. 

So here we are at mid-term in her 1st grade year. She did great all summer but as soon as school started there was acting out. I knew her meds needed upping but her teacher initially thought it would be ok and it was just 'back to school syndrome' that most kids get.  I knew better but Dr. Crazy won't up the meds if the teacher says everything's going ok.  What does a mom know after all?

Several weeks ago her teacher contacted me.  It appears Southern Darlin' was not settling into class. She is not staying in her seat, she's copying off of others' work, talking excessively and just fidgeting.   Worse news is that she has not made any progress so far in 1st grade and has in fact went back a bit. :(

Today a conference is set up with the principal, her teacher & the school counselor about getting her some testing.  I pushed for an IEP in Kindergarten and was told 'it wasn't done'.  I am asking again.  We have her ADHD diagnosis as well as her ARND (alcohol related neurological deficits - an off shoot of FAS but not enough physical features to get a FAS dx) diagnosis.. I'm sorry but I would think that the two of those combined (and documented by drs) would get us an IEP.

Everyday on the way to school (I drive them), I always say "YAY! School time!" cuz I'm all cheesy like that :)  

Normally, the kids all agree and cheer "YAY! School!" and then tell me something they're looking forward to today (even if it's just what they're having for lunch.. lol). 

All week Southern Darlin' has said "Boo!! I don't want to go. School is boring!!"

So we talked about how you have to go to school to learn. Learning is fun and even if you just want to grow up to be a princess (her current life goal) then you still have to learn and be smart because Princesses are super smart and know all kinds of things.

Still we got to school today and it happened.  The thing I've been dreading since she did it over and over again last year.  She refused to get out of the car.  She crossed her little arms and said "No! I am not getting out!"

Now remember, I drive a monster van. Which means to get to her seat and drag her out (which I've had to do in the past), I have to climb over two rows of seats.  I'm sure it's a highly amusing sight to watch Momma unbuckle her seatbelt and proceed to climb over two rows of seats to get an uncooperative child out of her seat.  Naturally, as soon as I climbed back there she jumped up, grabbed her backpack and hopped out of the van.

She got out of the van, let Spoiled Princess out and then tried to climb right back in again.  Uhmm no dearie.. Get your hiney out of my van and go to school.  * Lest you think I'm a mean ass Momma who cares not a bit for her kiddos, let me explain that Southern Darlin' did this quite a bit last year at school. I had the principal drag her kicking and screaming from the van, I walked her to her room & had her teacher hold her there so I could escape (otherwise she'd come running after me) and after a few minutes she was always fine.*

The principal was there - silly man always seems to appear at MY van to help the kids out of it and close the door, he must sense the crazy?!   I informed him (he's new this year) that she's a "runner" and he might want to watch her til she gets inside.  He held her hand and chatted with both girls as he walked them to the school. 

As I'm pulling away, I'm also watching in my mirror just in case I need to stop.

My girl gives it her best.  She pulls hard as she can and in the end, Mr.Principal had to pick her up to get her the last few steps.  I hope his shins don't hurt too bad because I saw quite a few kicks that I think landed.

Now I fully believe that she was just fine once she got inside. It's a power struggle but once she's inside she gives up and normally has a really good day. 

I'm actually thankful that it happened today of all days. 

Today -the day that I have that special meeting with everyone over the help Southern Darlin' needs. 

Southern Darlin' is normally the adorable little girl with cute little quirks that everyone laughs at and lets her get her way.  Very rarely do they see the defiance and manipulation.  I think seeing her this way this morning will cement into his head how much she truly is struggling in school that she doesn't even want to go anymore.  I'm hoping it will help him fight with me instead of against me for the help she needs.

Wish me luck and if anyone has any IEP advice- spill it to me quick! Meeting is after school today! :)

Back to School :)

It's that time of year again..  Time for school to start up.

I am one of those mom's that others hate. I don't look forward to school most years. I miss my kids. I like having them at home.   This year was especially tough as it's Spoiled Princess' first year of Kindergarten (all day)..

It's odd to be at home all day long with just my two little boys.  It's quiet (which in itself is odd to say since I happen to have the two loudest kids on the planet at home with me).   We'll adjust in time.. Next year Drool Prince will be at Kindergarten too- then I'll really be going crazy!

So while I wasn't eager for school to start, the kids were.  They missed their friends. They wanted to go back Now!  Southern Darlin' was the only one who had the slightest bit of hesitation about going to school and even she did well!

With no further ado- the official First Day of School 2010 picture :

You can clearly see Spoiled Princess' excitement..

Drama Queen- voted child to make Momma feel old at every turn.  So what if I had her when I was not quite 19.. The kid constantly makes me feel old. How can I possibly have a FRESHMAN in highschool?  When did this happen?   It's going to be really weird when she's a Senior and The Toddler is in Kindergarten..  hmm, I see what Daddy meant when he cried- "We were almost done!!".  Too late now. oops!

Attitude King- starting 7th grade this year.. Unfortunately for his sister, this year also happens to be the year that our school system decided to combine 7 &8th grade with the highschool.. So her first year at Highschool is also his first year at highschool.. ohh burn! To make things worse funnier  they actually have Study Hall together.. I almost couldn't quit the laughing when I heard that..

Southern Darlin' was not really looking forward to 1st grade.. She wanted to stay in Kindergarten with her old teacher . She was comfortable there.  Just talking about going to 1st grade could result in tears.  Oh the anxiety!  The first day of school revealed a calm Southern Darlin'.  She immediately insisted on taking her pill because she didn't want Momma to forget (ha!).  Into her class she strode and sat down like a big girl! No crying, no running after me!  Yay!!   side note- apparently I need to have her brush her teeth before she gets dressed..

 Spoiled Princess is my poser.. She's always striking up her model poses and requesting a picture now please!  

She surprises me daily.

She was the clingy one.

The one that you couldn't get out of her sight or Else.

She never spent the nite at Gma & Gpa's because she had to be touching me at all times.


Finally she has grown into her own little person.  This independent child who happily walks into her classroom with a hug, kiss & a bye Mom!

:sigh:  It makes a Momma proud and a tiny sad all at once. Where'd my baby go?

Count to 3.. 1, 2..THREE.. Wait girls, Don't say three.. I'll count.

Ok. I know I said no counting and close your mouth. but you have to smile a little SD..

What? SD- why do you look surprised? SP- smile!!

Thanks girls! That will work :)

And another year starts....