Thursday, January 14, 2010

A Southern Update..

So let's talk about Southern Darlin' for a bit.

She's six now. VERY proud of being six , especially once Mommy pointed out that it must be a big girl to be 6 because you have to use TWO hands to count them.. ha, yes I'm good.

Therapy is going well. I'm not sure we're making alot of progress at this point but she really enjoys going to therapy so perhaps she's getting a bond w/ the therapist at least and that should help later on, right?!

Some days life is great. The girl feels like she's always been here, my daughter.

Other days life is not so great and I'm wondering when her real parents will come pick her up because I don't see how she can fit into our house.  Thankfully we don't have as many of these days. But unfortunately they are still here.

We got to go sledding last week- a first for Southern Darlin'.  She giggled & had a great time! Shared the sled, took turns.. It was wonderful :)

Having Southern Darlin' here is starting to wear on Spoiled Princess.  You can ask anyone that has ever met her- Spoiled Princess is the sweetest child known to man. She's put up with alot from Southern' Darlin and I'm thinking she has come to her breaking point.  This past week, Southern Darlin' broke yet another of Spoiled Princess' toys.. Enough was ENOUGH.. Spoiled Princess firmly told her " If you ever break ONE more of my toys, we are going to send you back to Far-Away-State & your old mom!!"  Now before you get your backs up in a roar (is that even the way that expression goes? It sounds funny to me now.. Too bad I'm going with it!) I did talk with Spoiled Princess later and explained to her how very hurtful it was to say such a thing since that is one of Southern Darlin's very real fears.. Spoiled Princess felt horrible and cried :(  But it tells me something when she would actually resort to being mean like that.

Drool Prince has always loudly proclaimed (never when Southern Darlin' was around) that he doesn't care for her. I'm trying very hard to foster some love there but he's still a bit resentful that Southern Darlin' took over his spot in Spoiled Princess' life. He is acting out more and more as he sees Southern Darlin' have fits and tantrums.  :sigh:

Drama Queen & Attitude King tend to take it all in stride. They know she is their new sister & here to stay and they have more empathy for her baggage since they are older and understand more.

Why do I bring all this up? 

Our 6month waiting period is up.  We can officially adopt Southern Darlin' at any moment.  I contacted an atty in far-away-state.  Our new atty (who I like very much, thank you!) tried to speak to the judge about allowing us to finalize the adoption over the phone vs actually having to travel there.  He was not successful. This particular judge wants everyone there -in person- so he can SEE it is done. I can't say I blame him, honestly I'm happy that we'll be able to get a picture with the judge and all. Due to financial reasons, we have to put off the adoption (and required travel to far-away-state) until this spring.  This works out well for all involved. CPS has agreed with us putting it off.. Southern Darlin' is quite honestly FREAKED THE HELL OUT about going back to Far-Away-State because she fears that we will leave her there with someone new or send her back to her old mom (foster mom).  Although we have repeatedly assured her that she is with us forever & we'll never send her back, she still has that very real fear & it's hard for her to trust our word quite yet.   Plus the actual finalization means nothing to her.  She already uses her new name in school, her medicaid is listed with her new name (legal- uhm noo).. So this will just be a piece of paper...   At least our Spring Break is planned! ha..  I'm wondering how long I should wait to start preparing her for the trip. She is a child that needs to know what's going to happen- good or bad, so she can deal with it .. But I also know she's going to be stressing over it until we go and come home again because she just can't trust that someone will really keep her forever and ever.  So sad when you sit and think about it..



  1. Thank you for posting this and for your support. It is so nice to know we are not alone in this journey. So exciting about your adoption. Oh how I wish we were that close. We are hopeful it will be this summer before school starts but DHR is never in any hurry so we shall see.

  2. Well, not that it is good, but it is nice to know that Teena is not the only child who has made the crack "we're going to send you back" etc. Yikes! Good luck with the trip. I wouldn't tell Genea until we were actually locking the door behind us, but that is her best way to deal. The anticpation makes her go crazy, literally. Sounds like your SD is the opposite.


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