The poop post

The morning started off innocent enough.

Spoiled Princess got up and immediately sat down at her new picnic table. She's a little attached to it .

Baby Bug was crawling around, knocking over hampers and pulling his dirty clothes out.

Momma went to the kitchen, hollared downstairs for Drool Prince to GET UP already! and proceeded to make everyone's drink of choice (they're very into routine &must have their drinks - SP gets choc. milk cup, DP gets a "ba ba cup" which is his formula put into a sippy cup, & BB gets his bottle (or sippy of juice if he's already had bottle, depending on when he decided to wake up)).

Drool Prince comes upstairs and tries to sit down at the new picnic table.

Then it begins..

"Ewww.. Drool Prince smells like poop" Spoiled Princess starts hollaring.

"DP, did you poop your pants? Go lay down so I can come change you as soon as I get these cups finished" Momma yells.

"Ewwww! EWW! Mommma!!! Drool Prince has poop ALL OVER" SP exclaims.

Now honestly I was expecting an exploded diaper or something, til I came in there. The boy had poop caked and dried onto his hands, in his hair , all over his jammies.. This was not a simple diaper malfunction.

I'm not proud of my reaction. There was yelling, screaming and quite a few bad words passed my lips. We stomped immediately to the bathroom- jammies in the trash cuz Momma don't do that kind of mess. Bathtime- boy got cleaned up. Then it was time to survey the damage to his room. I was scared. I did not want to see it.

As soon as I got to the bottom of the stairs I could SMELL it.. There was poo on the bed, toys incased in poo (who the hell plays in their poop with TOYS? I mean come on? Honestly?), poo Smeared all over the wall- including poo on Pooh... I admit it now, poop smearing is more than I can handle. I bawled like a baby. This is the kid that hates to have his hands dirty at all- what possessed him to do this I have no clue.

Some will say that I should have had DP clean it up or help.. And that might have worked but personally I wanted him out of my sight so I didn't explode again. I felt bad for yelling earlier (not that he didn't deserve it but still) so the kid got stuck in BB's highchair and in the corner for timeout while I cleaned up the nasty mess.. But not before I let him watch me throw all those beloved whales that now had poop on them (or even near them cuz I'm mean like that) into the trash can..

What was he most upset about?? Momma dumping out his ba ba cup.. For the love of GOD! ugh.. He will be calling Pop-pop & Cowie later to confess his sins which will probably be his worst punishment (in his eyes)..

Now that it's over.. Momma needs a huge Dr Pepper- anyone deliver?

Free 3yo .. I may pay you to take him for the day!