Monday, March 9, 2009

An answer for Janine

Since Janine was nice enough to ask, I figured why not answer it for everyone?! (plus points for me, it now counts as a blog post.. lol)

....and yet the kingdom of chaos now has five kiddos reigning, even though the three littlest came without the pregnancy and birth (and yet you had one of those anyway,without adding a baby to the mix!)... so was that all in the plan when the cut was made?

Five kiddos with one pending.. We came a long way from the days of snipping. And no the plan was definitely not to end up with six kids! Although I have always wanted to have LOTS of kids (ask me when I was a kid & I said 20.. then I learned how babies came to be and decreased my number down to 10) but I married a man who was perfectly content with 1. One he agreed for that little trial back in June '96, he started immediately petitioning for the snipping. I waited a few years and then decided , ya know what? If he hasn't changed his mind by now- he never will and I am not about to force him to have another kiddo .. So I agreed to the snipping besides I'd went thru the fun filled labors of childbirth x2 to give him his offspring, if he deems that no more shall come forth- well then it's his turn to have a little pain 'down there'. I still missed being pregnant though and when the idea of doing a surrogacy entered my brain.. well it just furrowed right in & took root. I loved everything about my surrogacy journey. It was soo rewarding to help complete a family. I mean honestly, what better gift can you give someone? I truly meant to do it again, surrogacy is very addicting, but things didn't work out the way I'd hoped and now I'm pretty darn busy!

Anyhoo, after the surrogacy, we kinda looked at each other and said what's next? I fully admit that I came up with the idea of fostercare but Daddy Chaos was all for it. We'd helped a great couple get their daughter, now it was time to help some of those little kids out there that needed a home.

Getting into foster care, we had no hopes to adopt. I finally had come to agree with Daddy Chaos, our family was complete. We had the ideal family- 1 boy, 1 girl, 2 dogs.. no need to be selfish! We planned on doing just straight fostering. I imagined little kids coming, staying a few months & being reunited.. Followed by new little ones.. Funny now how naive I was back then. We decided to set our age at 0-3yo, everyone loved babies and I figured less jealousy in the bio kids if they didn't feel that they were competing against someone their own age..

I can clearly remember exactly where I was and what I was doing when I got each call (or email in Baby Bug's case) for my placements. Spoiled Princess was our first foster placement. The licensing worker (crazy cw) had told me during the process that they rarely got my age range and I'd probably end up doing respite. I had actually just dropped off a respite kiddo back to her foster family (from another county) when I got that phone call, so imagine my surprise when she offered me not only a 2yo little boy but a newborn! I accepted the newborn immediately and wanted to discuss the 2yo w/ Daddy Chaos (he was gone by the time I called back).. I picked up Spoiled Princess from the hospital by myself and when I got home I put her in Daddy Chaos' arms.. The rest, as they say, is history. His 2 kiddo tune changed almost immediately & he declared that same nite that if she came up for adoption , he wanted her. That in itself changed the path that the Kingdom of Chaos was on and we grew.. and grew.. and grew.. With #6 in the works & hopefully here by summer, the plan is to quit fostering and be done. Our family will be complete. We'll have added two sibling groups to our family and although I didn't get the 10 I hoped for, I can be happy with 6..

... besides, he changed his mind once right?

1 comment:

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