Bad Mommy Moment..

Dimples has been going to developmental preschool all year.  Although he is eligible for full time (4days a week), we decided that due to his difficulties with transitions we would start with just 2days per week.  It took quite some time for him to adjust to that.  He would go to preschool and hold everything in , then come home and explode with tantrums all evening long.  Exhausting!!

Finally in November he seemed to turn a corner. The tantrums lessened on preschool days and we all noticed how much he was finally opening up.  So naturally, I decided- he now loves preschool and isn't tantruming...let's throw another day into the mix just for fun. After Christmas break we started going 3 days per week.  It seemed to be going well until this week.

Suddenly he emphatically states NO!! When I mention that we have preschool in the morning..  I should note that our dev. preschool is housed in our elementary building and begins at the same time of day as the other elementary kids.. So on M,T & Th  I take my 4 youngest and drop them all off together.   Yesterday I hustled the Tequila gang out of the car and as they rushed off  I began getting Dimples out.   As he and I walked up to the building together, he suddenly turns to me "I carry you?!".  And so I carried him the rest of the way.  He went with his teachers but wasnt his normal happy bubbly self. 

Today I took him inside the building to wait for the teachers to gather his classmates from the bus.  It's 24* out this morning and Dimples has a hard time with cold.  We stood just inside the doors as I'm rubbing his arms and hands (thru his coat) trying to get the shivering to stop.  One of his teachers walked by and asked him if he was ready for school?  NO!!!  I go bye bye!!  and he proceeded to climb me like a monkey climbing a tree and hang on for dear life.   It was then that his teacher had a light bulb moment and thought she knew what was wrong..

You see every day of preschool from the beginning, Dimples would go right into the classroom, grab the barn and proceed to put all the forks and spoons from the play kitchen into the barn.  He would then sit down in his seat and guard the barn.  He won't play with the other kids but he is content to sit and guard his treasure.   One day, a new student arrived at preschool.  This little boy also very much liked the barn and it became a bit of an issue because Dimples- he ain't a sharin!   And so the barn disappeared into the closet not to be seen again.  After a few days of adjustment, Dimples claimed a basket to put his forks and spoons in and all was well again in the world.    Well apparently, the teacher thought that enough time had passed - Let's get out the barn!!   So last week, she got the barn back out of the closet.  Dimples went to school , saw the barn out and immediately yelled at her to "PUT IT BACK!!".     The barn is now safely back in the closet but alas, Dimples is no longer happy with preschool.  ugh.  It's the little things. 

So after having heard that story, as the teachers went out to gather the other kids I sat there assuring him over and over that the barn is put away in the closet. No one can play with it.  He's going to have so much fun at preschool and he can play with the kitchen and his basket of forks.. Teachers came back in and he climbs back into my lap.  Finally he goes with them but stood up, wiped the tears from his eyes with a swipe of the back of his hand and sadly walked along.

I died just a little bit right there.   I wanted to scoop him up and run away with him.  Let's go home where it's safe and everything stays in it's place.

Sadly, I'm now realizing that the whole barn at school also affected home life.  You see, Dimples got this awesome noise machine for Christmas that projects pictures onto the ceiling. His favorite picture scene is the "Cow" (cow jumps over the moon) and every night rather than rocking he would want to "Go bed, watch cows!".   Suddenly late last week (thinking back it was Thurs which was the day of the great barn out of closet ordeal) as we got ready for bed I asked if he wanted to rock or go watch cows and he screams NO!   Every since then he refuses to let me turn the music or the lights on.  "NO!!! You turn it off!!"   We've been wondering what in the world caused this change and now I'm curious to the connection.

Pooor baby.

xoxo,